What To Start With On A Platter?

The festive season brings a lot of events and gatherings; I don’t know about other countries but in Uganda everyday there is a party somewhere during the festive season. On Wednesday I got an invite from Jovago to attend a French event –something to do with French companies in Uganda celebrating together and all. Well, I being on #TeamFOMO Upon receiving the invite my mind buzzed “say no more fam, I got this” at the dusk, I got my corporate shoes ready and in just a flash I was at Kabira country club where it was all happening.

After checking in I looked around for people I might know, I can’t say I found many of them –the usual suspects I usually run into on events and it was understandable this event was mainly dominated by French people. Fast forward through the conversations and wine experience to the food time (Dinner). I don’t know if that dinner was called food. I looked at the plate of “food” that had 50% cheese content, 20% salads, 10% meat slices, 30% baked pieces. Well I looked at the plate and I couldn’t start! Though like the usual social media norm these days, I took a picture of the food and shared. After I looked at the plate and still couldn’t start; the cheese, the baked pieces, the meat slices and the salads, they all looked awesome and delicious. I have a thing of eating the delicious content of the food first then the rest just follow after. But here I was stuck; what do I start with?

Rarely does that happen, I thought after that day I won’t find any other kind of food arrangement that would make me pause before eating (read: digging in) little did I know that the vineyard Kampala was opening I was still invited by a close friend to attend. By the way there times at home and I look at food –one course meal and I shake my head. (Aftermath of too much events food) and please don’t say events or food will be the death me.

Moving on swiftly, so the vineyard opens and I tell a tight friend to tag along for the night, she accepts though because of the Kampala traffic on a Friday we checked in at different times. I checked in first and the crowd here had many faces that I knew, exchanged greetings and touched base about everything and nothing over the wine as we waited for the performances of the night.

No sooner had she arrived than the waitress delivered the platter. Forget the ‘Kikali’ and the buffet of the expensive meal of a hotel, but let’s think of this platter as the combination of the ‘Kikali’ and the buffet on single tray. This was the second time I looked at food and I couldn’t start. What to start with on a tray that has chicken pieces, beef pieces, sausages, fish fingers, vegetables, fries and a lot more. If you can’t relate to what I was subject to at least you can imagine, no?


I thought my night that was done after the platter I was thinking of heading home and that would be all, but… Steve keys got on the keys (Keyboard) and played a song that was on my head all day for no apparent reason. And the lady I was with said Joel Jemba that song please enjoy it (read: ‘kakunyumire’) definitely I had to change my going home arrangement, meanwhile Steve Keys’ playlist that night was proper; one song after the other I forgot about going home.

The music got intense and epic when Myko Ouma (If you don’t know this gentleman, ask around) joined Keys and I found myself on the dance floor. That Friday night was a memorable one.  Friends who took pictures me of dancing and all, this isn’t a threat it’s just a reminder; the pope didn’t visit Uganda for those things and remember God was watching you.

One more thing when you have a huge feast and you are given a lot of nice food, start with the most delicious according to your food chain preference –don’t wait when you’re satisfied yet you haven’t touched the delicious part of your meal.



7 thoughts on “What To Start With On A Platter?

  1. Hahaha now you Joel Jjemba didn’t your mother blackmail you with pictures & stories of starving children in Karamoja to get you to eat when you were young?
    How dare you not dive into such awesomeness?
    Any who nice work making the rest of us who are reading this feel like your life is better than ours especially on our hungry days..
    That said loved your unorthodox writing on foodieness or should I say eventfulness plus do you know if that Steve Keys guy is single? ☺☺☺hehehe
    *runs to check our your entire blog**


    1. Hahahaha my mummy blackmailed me on showering stories very many of them not food stories. Thanks for reading, your feedback is important. Again thanks. Meanwhile about Steve Keys, he has a Twitter handle do you want?


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